Since wordpress is RSSfail on embedding video, feed users will need to click-through if they’ve not already seen this TED talk: Alain de Botton: “A kinder, gentler philosophy of success.”
The part about having tabloid writers make headlines for classical tragedies (Hamlet, Oedipus) is especially noteworthy. It really give you an idea (even if, like me, you’ve never experienced these works proper – though most of us have through weary cinematic retreads of their basic plotlines) of how we view people and their stories. We look at that bum and assume “alcoholic” or “addict” and chart a mental downward descending tangent to their lives. But we don’t know. We just assume they’re completely responsible for their circumstances, because we’ve been told all our lives that we’re in control of things.
Tell that to the drunken bum raised by an abusive alcoholic father and absentee mother, who only received negative attention growing up. Who only receives negative attention now, because he’s perceived as responsible for what he’s become, even the forces beyond his control. On the other hand, there’s also a successful business man raised by an abusive alcoholic father and absentee mother, who received negative attention growing up, but somehow found enough example to follow to make a success of himself, whether through fortuitous family friend or taking-in relative, perhaps just one really great teacher who taught him how to learn.
There’s the bum that used to be a vet, haunted by his life at war, drinking himself slowly to death. The vet that came back, started a business that failed, slowly drinking himself to the same death, to become a bum sometime before that eventual death. The vet that came back, testified famously, went to Congress, and fought to make America an even better and freer place. The vet that came back, went to Congress, and fought to make America an even more militant and fearing place.
We’re taught that’s all their own doing. But every impact on our lives, everyone that comes up to us, they have a small bit of responsibility for shaping us. Every impact you make on someone’s life, everyone that you come up to, you have a small bit of responsibility for shaping them. That asshole you so righteously flipped off is now even more pissed off. That kid that saw you smoking. The love you make.
I’m not sure that’s the point of the video, it’s more about how to view yourself, but you can easily turn that inside out.
He also brings up the point that our ‘successful’ 1st world societies have much higher rates of suicide than 3rd world nations.
Tags: failure, philosophy, success, TED, video