Steined out? You may not be the only one.
Most gamers my age cut their teeth (and then vomited uncontrollably from the motion sickness) on Wolfenstein 3D. The original. The Pre-Doom ages. I was 14, and it was already old then but I got it for my Mac and played until I was cross-eyed. Thankfully modern-day truly 3 dimensional shooter games have figured out how to not make people vomit from just the game mechanics (it’s possible the fact that my computer could only render it in postage-stamp size had something to do with it) – the smooth motion of the game, so utterly unlike anything in human experience just set laser beams abounce in my inner ear. I don’t think I was even able to finish the game.
Fast forward 16 years: not gonna play the new Wolf. Why? Same reason I didn’t play Doom3 more than the first level. They’re BO-ring. Trying to figure out the stupid puzzles implemented by game designers (seriously, how many versions of pull that lever or find that key to continue are there going to be?) and the monotonous enemy combat (fuck up, reload, try a different tactic, rinse and repeat until you pass with enough health and ammo to be sure you can pass the next challenge) just doesn’t do it for me.
Team Fortress 2? Now, when I play that, I get to actually figuratively piss in someone’s cheerios every time I send a rocket flying up their ass after bouncing them into the air with my first rocket. See, you can’t piss off a computer (at least not yet) so what’s the point of trying to subjugate “AI” enemies? All they do is cheat, because there’s no other way to beat a human, or just use overwhelmingly massive force against you.
Now if you’ll excuse me, my rockets have a date with a team full of noobs.